Podcast Ep. 3: Are You a Success?
Invest In Your Life Podcast
Episode 3: Are You a Success?
Stop for a minute and imagine yourself as "successful"? What does that look like? Is it different than you are now? In this episode, I talk about what meaning we've assigned to success as well as the ways that success can be a way to escape our real problems and feelings.
Also in this episode: what is an "experience board"? Listen and find out.
Full Episode Transcription:
00:04 Welcome to the Invest In Your Life podcast, the show where we explore the connection between personal growth and personal finance. My name is Patrick King, and in each episode we'll talk about what you can do to live a life that's truly rich. Don't take this the wrong way, but I am not giving you advice. I only give advice to clients who have hired me to be their fiduciary financial advisor. If you're not one of those folks, then just consider this to be helpful tips and information and be sure to consult with your financial advisor, your attorney, your CPA, your witch doctor, or your mom before you try this at home.
01:01 Welcome to the show people. I’m Patrick King and I've got a good show for you today. At least I think it's a fantastic show, if I don't say so myself. I want to talk about success today. Is it a thing? What is your idea of success? Do you even believe it's real? Yeah, let's get into that some. Uh, but first, uh, let's get into the first part of the show. Gratitude.
01:33 Hey, uh, one, one piece of gratitude. I have for, for today for me is, uh, is having this business. Everything I've gone through to create this business, it's, um, it's been a lot. It's been a lot of work. It has not been easy. I've never worked harder in my life, but I've also never had more fun at work doing what I do. And I think sometimes when people ask me about it, they think it's all about working on the couch in your pj's or something like that. But I guarantee you it's a, it's maybe a lot harder than you think it is. Even if there are PJ's involved on the couch from time to time, you're still working on Saturdays and Sundays and late at night and stuff too. Um, but it's a lot of fun and you know, there's incredible highs and there've been some, some really lonely times too, especially when Doug e fresh, my beat my Beagle, uh, rest his soul passed away last fall that there was, that was a really lonely time for me. I didn't realize how much had talked to him. I was working from home. Uh, but yeah, it's, it's something I'm really grateful for. It's a big leap that I took to start the, to start the firm. But I'm going to look back now. You know, I talked about the ceiling tile test in a few episodes ago. Uh, when the ceiling tile test comes, this is going to be something I'm so grateful I've done. So that's my gratitude today.
03:08 All right. The topic is success. All right, so what, what I want you to think about right now is when you think of success, what does that mean to you? What is your definition? If you were to sit there and say, I'm a success. What does that person look like?
03:35 I'm really curious because let me get into the definition of success. You know, started researching this and of course, you know, I'm like, well, let's go to the dictionary and this is, this actually blew my mind. The Merriam Webster, the number one, the first definition of success is outcome or result, but it said it was obsolete. This definition of success, an outcome or a result is now an obsolete definition. That was the original definition when it was first used in 1537 according to Merriam Webster, um, that success was just an outcome or a result. There wasn't any kind of judgement tied to it at all. But it went on to say that the number two definition is a favorable or desired outcome or the attainment of wealth favor or imminence, imminence. Like it's like you have to be the pope to be successful. Your Eminence or is that a bishop?
04:37 Ah, shit, I can't get them all straight. Um, I could go some, I got throw some tasteless jokes. I hear on that one but, but, and then the last, the last definition is one who succeeds. So think about that. You know, we've assigned a meaning of wealth to the word success, but it did not start out that way. What had happened in that crazy that it just didn't start out that way. So if we think about it in terms of the original usage, all outcomes are successes based on the plans it created them, right? If a success is just an outcome or a result, all outcomes. Therefore successes our successes based on what went into creating those outcomes. So, you know, what does this mean for, for us in the context of living a successful life or being financially successful or having a successful career? Well, I think for me what it comes right back down to is we're going to have a successful outcome. It all depends on the quality of our plans.
05:53 So if we're going through life and we don't have quality plans, our careers, our financial situations, the things that we want to do that before we check out our relationships, then you know what, we're going to have successes, you know, in the old term, old usage of the term, but that are absolutely tied to the quality of our plans. So that's, that's the one thing for me that comes up and also to, you know, this, this wealth definition of success. You know, what does it like? I think there's, there's plenty of subjectivity to that. You know, if there's, let's say there's an executive that, you know, like a big time corporate person or lawyer or whatever, uh, who's, let's say this person is pulling down half a million dollars a year, let's make it a dude because we do, it's get picked on a lot and sometimes for good reason.
06:52 So this dude, he's making half a million a year. Would you call it a success? Would you call them that success if you knew that his spouse and his kids resent him? So I think, you know, we need to, uh, to just check ourselves when it comes to the definition of success. I know I tried to, uh, there's a podcast that I listened to that a, that ends ends every interview where the host asks the guest, what is your definition of success? I think for me, like I just, I'm going to reject it. Um, uh, you know, that idea of success in the traditional sense just really doesn't have any meaning to me anymore. I really kind of cringe when I hear people think, oh, I want to be successful, or he's a success or she's a success. That makes me kind of cringe a little bit at this point in my life.
07:42 I don’t know, maybe things will change, but that's what's up and success. You know, there's so many people out there who are exuding an image of success because they're running from something, you know, they're, they might be running from the discomfort of being rejected. You know, I don't want to be rejected. So let me wear nice clothes, drive a fancy car, you know, I don't want to be ridiculed. So let me, let me project this false image of success, this material image of success. Even though I'm a little hollow and lonely and dying inside, you know, people are running from that discomfort of, of loneliness and in order to attract other people in their lives, they try to front as a, as being successful. Yeah. So there's a lot of people that are front, front and out there to borrow, borrow old school, hip hop term.
08:41 I don't know if they, shit, I haven't listened to enough recent hip hop. But, but yeah, a lot of people are fun. So what I ask you to do is make success an inside job. Make that success, make it less between, uh, what's between your ears and more what's in your heart and what's in your gut and let yourself off the hook on all these comparisons about what you think success looks like. And just do your thing. I don't want to say you do you because we all owe each other the responsibility of care in this world, but, but when it comes to success, yeah, absolutely. You do.
09:30 Alright. Today’s “order off the menu”. So for me, one way in my life I like to order off the menu is this idea of essentialism. I'm not going to say I'm a minimalist by any means. Like the hardcore people, like the minimalist trolls on the Internet would just totally crush me because I don't, I've got stuff. But yeah, I really don't have a lot of stuff. I've really kind of over over the last few years started to pare down the things that I own. I own fewer clothes. I mean if you think about it, do you really wear all your clothes or do you what you were like 20% on a regular basis and the other 80% just kind of collects dust. Think about that. What I've found is when I start clearing space, it’s kind of freeing.
10:31 Things are freeing. It'll, it'll end, it allows space for other stuff to happen and it may not necessarily be other material things, but flexibility for sure. Having less things gives you more flexibility. I'm not saying you should go like full on like Buddhist monk in the mountain and minimalist but, but yeah, I, you know, just something to think about there. Do you really need six chef knives in your kitchen? Just saying so that's a, that's one way I order off the menu. I really love it and I can't say enough about it. So organized and I know where most of my stuff is for the most part. Um, so yeah, there you go. All right, Q&A send in your questions. Hit me up, Patrick at Invest In Your Life, podcast.com or go to Invest In Your Life lab, apply, investinyourlifepodcast.com. Totally good at talking. Uh, yeah, hit me up for some questions. I would love to hear from you.
11:47 And now time for the Pura Vida section of the podcast today. One thing that I, I re I moved, I moved in with my girlfriend. It's been kind of awesome. She hasn't, no, she has an awesome house. She's, she's amazing. Uh, just to begin with. So it's cool to kind of step into that. Uh, so, but she, she was so amazing. She carved off a, a bedroom and a in a attach bath. I've got this whole boyfriend, sweet thing going on. It's, it's really amazing and I feel really grateful for that. But one thing that I've put back up on the wall that I used to have is something I call an experienced board. Now, what does an experienced board, right? Um, I try stuff, I always try stuff and, and I tried the whole vision board thing and it just didn't work out so well for me.
12:40 You know, especially when, you know, you put all these big visions out there for the year or whatever it is and some you hit and you know, maybe some you don't. Sometimes shit happens. And then I found, I felt bad about the ones that I didn't head. I'm like, what was that all about? So, so instead of like having a vision board, what I ended up doing is taking that same board, it's like a combo dry erase and corkboard. And I turned it into what I call an experience board. So with the experience board, what I do is throughout the year, now you're a reset it every year. So throughout the year I will tack up a concert ticket or a football for a ticket to the football game that I went to. I just did a 5K and they gave me a metal, which cracks me up for doing a puff.
13:37 I ran when I was a kid. So I could just kind of roll out of bed and run, you know, 5K like it was no big deal, but it's a big deal for some people. So I know I shouldn't be laughing at that, but, but I got up, I got the metal, I'll put it on my experience board. So, uh, so, and what's great is I found throughout the year when I look back at that experience board, I can remember all the great times that I've had over the years. So not only do I get to relive it again, I get to experience that gratitude of, Hey, look at all these amazing things that I did. Because sometimes you forget, sometimes you really forget like how much awesome stuff you accomplish or experience, uh, during, uh, during the course of a year. So, so yeah, just something I'm throwing out there as Pura Vida, maybe try it, maybe don't. This is something I want to come back to at some point. Um, and one of my resources that's on the website. I want to do a quick how to on this and maybe, uh, maybe we'll do a couple of videos of me walking through through mine. So experienced board, check it out, think about it would have you.
14:52 All right. Thanks so much folks. That's the show for today. I hope you found it useful. I a man, I really kind of like this. Um, I hope you like it too. I am having fun with this and uh, stay tuned. We'll have more stuff and I'll get fired up, I promise. Uh, and shit, I was kind of low and profanity this episode, so I'll do better next time. Thanks. Thanks for listening and I will talk to you soon. Thank you for joining me today. To find out more and get access to my free financial resources visit, investinyourlifepodcast.com.
15:40 The thoughts and opinions expressed here are my own and or for general information only, they are not intended to be recommendations or specific advice for anybody. I'm not a doctor or a licensed therapist. So please consult with your healthcare provider if you had any issues regarding your physical or mental health. Any investment performance that's referenced here is historical, and of course has no guarantee of future results. Last but not least, the Easter Bunny isn’t real.