Podcast Ep. 16: It's Okay to Change Your Mind

Podcast Ep. 16: It's Okay to Change Your Mind


Episode 16: It’s Okay to Change Your Mind

Have you ever put an audacious goal out there - only to realize that it's making you miserable? And how do you know when to grit it out and when to quit? In this week's episode, I dive into when it's okay to change your mind about financial (or any other) life goals.


00:00  Okay, welcome to the Invest In Your Life Podcast, the show where we explore the connection between personal growth and personal finance. My name is Patrick King, and in each episode we'll talk about what you can do to live a life that’s truly rich. Don't take this the wrong way, but I am not giving you advice. I only give advice to clients who have hired me to be their fiduciary financial advisor. If you're not one of those folks than just consider this to be helpful tips and information and be sure to consult with your financial advisor, your attorney, your CPA, your witch doctor or your mom before you try this at home.

01:00  Hello everybody and welcome to the show. I'm Patrick King and I've got a great topic for you today. Changing your mind. Have you ever put a big audacious goal out there, only to, in the middle of working towards accomplishing it, realize, “Hey, this sucks.” I certainly have! So, today I want to talk about changing your mind. It's okay to do it and when is the time you choose between quitting and grinding? When I say grinding, I mean gritting it out. We'll get into that in a second. But first I want to let you know about The No Bullshit Guide to Investing. And know if you've heard the podcast, in prior episodes I've talked about The Five Secrets of the Ultra-Wealthy, but today I really wanted to do something different and I've created a course called the The No Bullshit Guide to Investing.

01:59  It's over an hour and a half of video content and guides to help you if you've ever wondered how to invest like a pro, if you want to do it yourself. I know it's not always a good fit for people to work directly with me. I'm not the cheapest financial advice in the world. I'm certainly not the most expensive, but I'm fair for the experience and the knowledge and the wisdom I bring to the table. But it's not for everybody. And for some of those folks, especially like the young kids, you folks that are out of college -- I say kids, you're adults. Um, you're out of college now and you're wondering how do I invest my money? Well, in The No Bullshit Guide to Investing, we'll walk you through the pro way to think about your investments. And it's free. I'm giving it away for podcast listeners only. And I say it's free, but I ask you one thing in order to access this: I ask that you tell to people about either podcast or the course.

03:00  So, pass it along to two people and it's my gift to you. I'd also like your feedback on it as well. So, go on over to www.investinyourlifepodcast.com and look in the resources section. From there, choose The No Bullshit Guide to Investing. Enter code: TELL2. And let me know what you think. Either shoot me an email at patrick@investinyourlifepodcast.com or find me through the website. Shoot me a message there. There's all some Q&A in the course for you to give me feedback along the way. It's something new. It's maybe some of it's a little ham-fisted, just because, you know, I'm me and I like not taking it too seriously. So, hopefully it's a little light and hopefully you enjoy it. Hope you get something out of it. That's it. The No Bullshit Guide to Investing. Check it out. All right, let's start the show. Let's get right into my gratitude.

04:02  So, my gratitude this week, you know, it's almost two years of Transformative Financial. It's really hard to believe that I've been out on my own and running my own independent financial planning firm for two years now. It just seems like yesterday that I started the firm and it's been an amazing ride. I'm just so grateful for all of it. Even the, even the tough parts. Because some of those made me realize, oh yeah, I can do this even through the ups and downs. And it’s been a great ride and that it's now getting to the point now where the practice has turned it into what I had envisioned and it's been a lot of fun. So that's my gratitude for today. Two years.

04:54  All right, let's get into the meat of this episode. You know, it's okay to change your mind. It's okay. Part of today's episode is I want to talk to you and give you permission to change your mind when you need to or when you want to. You know, we talked about putting an audacious goal out there, only to realize it is not nearly what you imagined it to be. You know I've done this, gone down the path only to realize that it's not fulfilling. Was it nearly what you had imagined it was going to be? Was it fun? Was energy draining? Oh my gosh. Let me give you two examples from my life. You know, number one, believe it or not, I was a mechanical design engineer in the first part of my career only to realize that, while there were parts of the job that I enjoyed, it certainly wasn't very fulfilling.

05:52  Also, there was this whole issue around all of the design jobs being outsourced to India and China. I actually had a Chinese visa to go train our replacements when I worked at, um, an outdoor lighting company which will remain unnamed. So, the writing was on the wall, you know. I'd put a lot of time and effort into being an engineer. And I was pretty dang good, if I don't say so myself. That sounds like super-egotistical, but I mean, I did a good job. But you know what? I allowed myself to change my mind. I changed careers. I'm doing this now and I'm so much more fulfilled doing this and I still get to do plenty of math.

06:38  So that's one instance in my past where I've changed my mind. Another, and this is maybe a little bit more of a lighthearted example. I always wanted to learn how to play bass guitar. So, I think it was like a year and a half ago, I went over to Guitar Center and bought myself a bass guitar and I sat down and I practiced for like an hour a day for like three weeks and then realized I was miserable. I hated practicing. I tried to grit through it. I think maybe my hands aren’t anatomically set to actually play a guitar. My hands were just, it was just a miserable experience. And even though I still love to listen to bass guitar parts and a lot of songs, I just realized it went for me. So luckily, Guitar Center had one of those 30 day, no questions asked return policies.

07:39  I gave it a shot, but it wasn't for me. It wasn't fun. I didn't enjoy it. And one of the reasons I knew wasn't fun. It was because certain hobbies like photography, I loved the grind. I loved getting in there and experimenting and having failures and learning from the failures. And it was that experience of learning photography and understanding that, while it wasn't easy, I still enjoyed the process. That allowed me to give myself permission to quit playing bass guitar for the ever so short time that I tried it. So yeah, life should include experimentation along the way. How do you know what you're going to like unless you try it? And if you don't like it, of course it's time to give it up. So you know, back to my point about when to have grit and when to quit.

08:34  So, when do you know when that point is? What I would encourage you to do is to pay attention to your intuition about that. Does this activity drain you? Are you no longer passionate about it? And do you daydream of escaping whatever this activity is? Those are all good signs that hey, maybe it's not aligned with what you really want in life. Sometimes it may be easy, like, hey, I've still got the receipt for the bass guitar. Let me just take this sucker back. Sometimes it might be hard, it might be a career change and you might have to invest in your life and go and upgrade your skills in order to make a change in the path of your career. Either way, it's worth noting that you are allowed to change your mind. So, think about it. You know what, if Einstein didn't quit being a patent clerk, there'd be – I don't know, he probably – that theory of relativity probably would've come out anyway – but yeah, he was a patent clerk. Not the highest and best use of his skills there. What if Walt Disney didn't quit being a newspaper editor?

09:51  He brought some different and cooler stuff to the world doing his own thing, right? So “quit versus grit”. At the end of the day, ask yourself one question, “Would you regret quitting this on your deathbed?” If you're going to regret giving it up, changing your mind about whatever it is, then go ahead and grid it out. Give it some more time. There's always a dip whenever you try something new where it's just awkward. You know, riding a bicycle doesn't come easy. As kids, we take it for granted, I guess as adults, but sometimes you just do a face-plant. There's always a little bit of a dip before you get back up to speed on that learning curve. But if you're not going to regret giving whatever it is up or changing your mind about something, then go ahead. Do it. Move on to the next thing. It's okay. I give you permission to change your mind. All right? That's the topic of the day today.

11:00  Alright, now it's time for Q&A. A listener asks, “Hey Patrick, what is the most common mistake that you see when you start working with someone on their financial plan?” And that's a great question. Great question. First off, let me say, there's no judgment here. I see all kinds of stuff. We've not been taught any of this financial stuff along the way. You know, how was that class in high school that taught you about budgeting and investments that taught you the difference between a stock and a bond? Oh wait, you didn't have that class! So yeah, don't turn the knife on yourself if you don't know all this stuff or if you've got parts of your financial life that aren't 100% perfectly in order, no judgment. When people walk into my office or we sit down and we talk about their financial position, it's really not your fault. But back to the one thing.

11:55  You know, some of the things that I see a lot of that, of course I'm not going to judge someone on, but I want to tell you about in case this may apply to you. The number one thing that I commonly see is that folks don't have estate planning documents. And some of you are sitting there probably saying, “Patrick, I don't need an estate plan. I don't have a whole lot of stuff. You know, my wife's going to get it or my husband's going to get it or my kids getting in it.” First of all, that may not be what you need your estate planning documents for. When I say estate planning documents, there are three specific things I want you to look for. Number one is a will, number two is an advanced directive for healthcare and number three is a financial power of attorney.

12:39  So, the will obviously tells the judge or the court or whomever what to do with your stuff if you die. But the most important part of the will for a lot of people is the guardianship provision for their kids. If you've got kids and you want to make sure that it's your brother and not your sister-in-law that raises the kids if you get hit by the proverbial MARTA bus, (we have the MARTA system here in Atlanta), yeah – that belongs in your will. So, get that done. Advanced directive for healthcare: quite frequently, folks don't have this, but it's necessary. Even if you're a 21 year old person, a lot of parents assume that once their kids graduate from college, they can still walk into the doctor's office until the doctor what to do. Now your kids the age of majority, they need to have those docs too.

13:33  So, number one thing that I see that's missing is missing estate planning documents. It's one of those things, those “adulting” things that we all need to do. It sucks to think about our demise or incapacity and all that great stuff, right? Uncomfortable conversations. But it's part of that adulting thing that we need to do a few of us follow up on. So I ask you, go ahead. Even if it's LegalZoom, that's better than nothing. Get it knocked out. Get those three documents knocked out. Wills, financial power of attorney and advanced directive for healthcare. I hope you never have to use them.

14:11  All right, that's Q&A for today. All right. Last section. This week’s Pura Vida. So My Pura Vida this week was my trip to Washington state to go see my good friend Mike Kelly. We went out and hiked on Mount Rainier, got to check out some of the amazing waterfalls out there. It was snowing like once we get to a certain elevation, it was knowing like mad. And this is June. It's been like 90 degrees here in Atlanta. It was snowing. It was crazy, but it was awesome. And then we also spent a morning kayaking out on the Puget Sound and that was unbelievable. We got to see bald eagles – they are just not a big deal out there. Got to see a few of those suckers. Got to see an osprey, got to see a family of seals that just were like super-curious and just poke their little head out of the water and they just kind of kept their eye on us for a second. It was awesome. It was really cool and it was great to catch up with Mike and his wife, his special lady, Erin. Mike and Erin are the co-founders of MemberVault. That's the software that I use to implement my online resources. So, if you go download The No Bullshit Guide to Investing, that is powered by MemberVault. It was really cool and I really enjoyed that. That was my Pura Vida this week.

15:48  Okay folks, that's the show this time. Thank you so much for listening. Do you have questions about maybe, “Hey, should I change my mind on this?” Whether it's a financial situation or just something in general, let me know. Shoot me an email, patrick@investinyourlifepodcast.com. Check out the website, www.investinyourlifepodcast.com. You can send me a message there. Check out my free resources and yes, use TELL2 to access The No Bullshit Guide to Investing. Hope you enjoy that. Hope you've enjoyed the show. Thank you so much for listening. And until next time, cheers.

Thank you for joining me today. To find out more and get access to my free financial resources visit invest in your life, podcast.com the thoughts and opinions expressed here are my own and or for general information only. They are not intended to be recommendations or specific advice for anybody. I'm not a doctor or a licensed therapist, so please consult with your healthcare provider if you had any issues regarding your physical or mental health. Any investment performance this referenced here is historical and of course has no guarantee of future results. Last but not least, the Easter bunny isn't real.

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